Life, America, Randomness

Pickup Lines.

with 7 comments

Such a wonderful invention. Here are some of my favorites –

For international hunters:

“So, read any good Jihadist websites lately?” *

For the ‘I get women’ angle:

“Are you a heavy bleeder?”

For the sophisticated

“Your mom must be hot” **

For the romantic:

“I’ve been a gardener for 30 years and have yet to see a flower like you”

For the reverse psychology artists:

“I’ve been taking dumps for 30 years and have yet to see a piece of shit like you”

For the creepy:

“You have beautiful eyes – can I touch them?”

For the HIppie:

“I’m an Organic Vegan and I taste delicious – are you a herbivore?”

For the Foreign lover:

“Do you believe in love from the first look?”

For the Freudian slip-ers:

“Wanna come to my room? have a cup of coffee…? a fuck of tea?”

For the redneck:

“You remind me of my Peccary”

For the practicals:

“Your hips look like they were made for childbearing. I’d like to mate”

For the Pedos:

“You’re before your Bar Mitzvah, right?

For Jdaters:

“The rabbi didn’t use any magnifying glass during my bris.”

* Copyrighted, Aloni. A.

** Copyrighted, Fleming. H.


Written by Frankelstache

August 31, 2009 at 4:10 pm

7 Responses

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  1. ā€œIā€™m an Organic Vegan and I taste delicious ā€“ are you a herbivore?ā€

    ABSOLUTELY going to use this one.

    Amanda Blog and Kiss

    September 1, 2009 at 7:02 am

    • Let me know how it works! If it leads into a happily ever after, I demand you name your 6th child after me.



      September 1, 2009 at 9:11 pm

  2. Ha!
    You are brilliance personified, FS,

    As a matter of fact, I’m a little jealous. The “I get women angle” is something that I’ve just never been able to pull off in my work. (What can I say, I just don’t get them)

    In fact, I think that you and I need to go into the pick-up line business together. We’d saturate the market like nobody’s business. In a good way.

    You have beautiful eyes can I touch them indeed,



    September 2, 2009 at 8:13 am

    • Dear Chief Flight Attendant of Love and Happiness Airline, B

      I will start any business with you. We should go into the pimping industry together, I have some entrepreneurial ideas we should hash out.

      Flowers, Cactus, Pearls.


      September 2, 2009 at 10:05 pm

  3. these are all so funny…my fav is the freudian…enjoyed the post frankelstache!


    September 2, 2009 at 3:40 pm

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